Weekends in the hospital are the worst.

Nothing happens. When you're sitting in the hospital you want to feel like things are happening and moving forward, and spending 2 days doing and accomplishing nothing is hard. I always end up a bit blue on the weekends.

They are also days without visitors usually - which compounds the blueness. During the week people come by alot because they are in the city for work and my hospital is not too far out of the way on their way home - most of my family lives out of town, so they are only in the city on the weekdays for work.

So today was a long day. I did manage to get some writing done and even got a nibble on a freelance article for the newspaper which is exciting.. but for the most part today was like most saturdays in the hospital. Depressing.

In the big picture things are happening.

I had my Vas Cath central line placed yesterday morning, very successfully (I love my Interventional Radiologist - he is amazing!) so I am ready for the plasmapheresis (which will start Monday). TPN started last night, so I am hooked up to that for 18 hours a day (I should be down to 12 hours by mid week) and already today my pain level has dropped noticably since I am no longer forcing food into my broken gut.

My cardiologist stopped by yesterday and will support our claim for Compassionate Care Benefits through EI so Dave can take the next 2 months off work to help me get adjusted to our 'new normal' when i get home on TPN - as well as manage the boys care. It will be very nice to have him at home. He will get 50% of his income through EI and we will top it up with what is left of our savings which will give us until January 1st to get settled and readjusted and hopefully make the Mayo Clinic trip in there.

The 'new normal' is daunting. It's very hard being 'broken' when for so long I was the one that managed most of Brandon's care. Depending on everyone around me to not only take care of Brandon, but help take care of ME is a very difficult adjustment.

I dont like being dependant.

But in the words of my Grandma - it is what it is.

We will take it one day at a time. And we'll manage.

Off to have a jolly rancher for supper.

A more positive blog post will follow tommorrow I promise.

Thanks for checking in,



  1. Praying sweetie. HUGE HUGE HUGS!



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